I’ve Got A Secret

Secrets, everyone has them, but how do they make us feel? THIS ISN’T A THESIS  I can recall one of the biggest secrets I have kept up to date, and it all started a few years ago. One hot summer day my boyfriend and I decided to go to the park. After being there for quite some time we decided it was time to go home since it looked as if it was about to rain. Since we were not far from my house I offered to drive us. On the way home a car ran a stop sign and crashed right into us. As we straggled to get out of the car we immediately noticed that his car had a significant amount of damage. As a result of the accident my boyfriend’s car was claimed as a total loss. At the time neither he or his parents had the money to get him another car. Instead his dad decided to fix up his cousins old broken down car and he gives it to him. The issue then came that the car would randomly turn off as he was driving it. Although the accident wasn’t my fault, I felt somewhat responsible since I was the one driving his car. I spoke with my parents and we decided that it was only right to help him get a new car. We spoke to my boyfriend about it and although he resisted at first, I eventually convinced him that it was okay to let us help him. We went on to sell the car his dad had given him and then I matched what they had given him at the dealer for the car. With that it gave us enough money to put a down payment on a truck he had been looking at in another dealership. We got the truck and he couldn’t have been happier. The only problem was that no one from his family could find out that I had helped him buy the truck. When we showed up at his house we had decided that the story was going to be that: the dealership gave us more for the car that his dad gave him than they actually did, and the truck cost less than what the other dealership actually sold it to us for, and that was how he was able to afford it. They were extremely skeptical at first and asked a lot of questions. They continuously tried poking holes in our story to try to get to the bottom of it. His siblings would come up to us individually and talk to us about it to see if they could get more out of the story. At first it was nerve wrecking, having them ask so many questions and trying to make sure no one found out. Although we were nervous at the first, we eventually got use to the questions, and it began to feel quite empowering having this secret that only we knew. As empowering as it may have felt, after a while they forgot about it and we felt that enough time had passed that if they did find out it would no longer be an issue. Slowly, through passing conversation, we told person after person the truth, and it was as if a weight had been lifted off of our shoulders. ALL YOU WROTE WAS A DIARY ENTRY…


I’ve Got A Secret

I genuinely have had a lot of trouble with this assignment, because as stated in the assignment, this is the Internet and most, if not all, of my secrets are current situations that I still cannot discuss. After reading the No Secrets article, I am very hesitant about what to write about.

Over winter break my brother decided he was going to propose to his girlfriend on Christmas evening in New York City. In the process of formulating this plan it seemed like it was going to be cake. Little did I know, flying someone three thousand miles away to get asked a question was a lot harder than expected. My brother had already spoken to her parents and the plane tickets were all bought but our flight was 5 a.m. Christmas morning.

No one really was able to empower anyone because pretty much everyone was in on the surprise but my sister-in-law. The only time the secret came close to getting ruined when I asked if we were to be opening our gifts in the airport like an idiot. Fortunately, she was not paying attention to my idiocy.

Keeping the secret was not an issue; the plan was fabricated beautifully. No one was harmed, no relationship were put at stake, and all in all no damage was done. In the process a few lies did have to be told in order to keep the secrecy and the identity of the plan had to remain concealed.


Secrets, Secrets are no fun…

For most people, keeping your first secret happens at a very young age. Whether it be a fib a family member tells us jokingly or something we overhear elders talking about, the notion of secrecy is something that is instilled in us from the beginning. It has to do more with personality when it comes to actually being able to keep those secrets. It’s often the same people that would have told your crush that you liked them that would also interfere in something greater or perhaps professionally as adults. YOU DON’T NEED THESE SENTENCES. GET TO THE POINT.

Ethically, something goes off in my brain when I know someone is telling me something in confidence. At first, there is a rush that is felt because of the exclusivity of information that is transmitted into my brain but shortly after it can become somewhat of a burden especially if the secret is something very personal or dark.

Unlike the story of Julian Assange and his project to unmask dozens of government secrets, my story about keeping a secret is one that has shaped many decisions in my life.

While working at a restaurant a few years ago, I developed a close friendship with a fellow server named Vee. Even though she was a few years older, we found ourselves at a similar time of life; exploring, experimenting, and seeking adventure. She had been seeing someone for just a few short months when she found out she was pregnant. She was in no way, shape or form cut out to be a mother. She had decided within days that she was going to have an abortion. She didn’t tell me until the day before. It was a complicated secret because this required her to take a few days off from work and having known how close we were, everyone started asking me where she had gone. It was eye opening because I didn’t know if I was judging her while trying to be supportive but I absolutely knew I wouldn’t tell anyone.

My choice to keep that to myself was not only because she asked me to. It was because my moral compass knew that information like that was no one else’s business but hers. I also knew the emotional rollercoaster CLICHE Vee was about to embark on. It did not make me feel empowered at all to know this secret but it did make me feel honored by her trust in me. The feeling of everyone asking why she wasn’t at work, made me defensive in a way even though it wasn’t anything to do with me. I chose to tell a lie about her having stomach problems and being admitted to the hospital just as we had discussed I would. It was a huge test to my own ethical standards to lie to colleagues and my bosses but the matter felt completely out of my hands. Her secret would stay with me for 5 years, never having told anyone until she was blessed and gave birth to her beautiful son.


48 Hour Blackout

When I first started this assignment, I did not think it was going to be all that complicated because I don’t watch the news, of any sort, and I no longer use my twitter account. Solidarity has never been an issue for me, even as a child. I am not an only child but I have a short attention span so getting to the state of boredom is quite difficult. I have this theory that being by yourself, you are never fully alone. I have to listen to music at almost all times in the day; it keeps my sanity. Without it, I would probably have felt how every other student felt during this 48-hour blackout.

Since moving out and living on my own, (I do have roommates but they were picked randomly) I have found myself with very little or no free time at all. This assignment was a good excuse to exile myself from the world and get back in touch with myself. I just happened to be off of work all weekend as well so during the 48 hours I went food shopping, cleaned up the entire house and basically binge watched Showtime’s hit series Shameless. It was honestly nothing out of the norm for me when I do find free time or like during winter break when I was in high school.

During this time, it didn’t dawn upon me that my phone was on do not disturb mode. I was so drained nothing bothered me. Regularly, other than gossip, checking the weather before I leave the house every here and there would probably be the only things I would have to change in my every day life in order to complete this assignment. If I wasn’t as tired as I was, I probably could have started itching after the first two seasons of the show not being able to be on my phone and talk about a whole lot of nothing with my friends.

Ultimately, I may have been a rare individual in this experiment because I am such an extrovert and yet I find so much peace and enjoyment in solitude. Being by myself helps me re-gather my thoughts and my life. YOU SHOULD HAVE ALLUDED TO THE READINGS. After a few hours or days by myself, I could have done absolutely nothing but realistically, without noticing I had all the time in the world to think and rethink everything that’s going on around me without any distractions. I also love to sleep so any excuse to not have to leave my bed is a plus for me. RUN-ON.


48 hour Blackout

After reading “The End of Solitude” by William Deresiewicz, I can see my entire generation in what he describes. The first half of my life was spent with the dial up style of internet use but now as an adult, I am submerged in a world where Instagram and various apps rule. Albert Einstien once said, “I fear the day technology will surpass our human interaction. The world will have a generation of idiots.’ This has stuck with me as I realize that human interaction is nearly extinct. We live in a world where the average 18 year old can tell you what Kylie Jenner’s personal life consists of but not what is going on globally. We go out to restaurants with “friends” and stare down at our phones together followed by going to someone’s house and spending time staring at our phone some more.

After disconnecting from all media for 48 hours, my anxiety levels were through the roof. I consider myself a socially aware person and try to keep up with issues going on in the world at all times. With that, came the social anxiety of detaching from Snapchat and Instagram because of FOMO or better known as the fear of missing out. Even if we are not taking part in the activities or plans that are posted all over social media, the lack of knowledge of what is going on creates the feeling of being left out. I did find myself trying to make other plans and keep myself busy to distract from the lack of social media use. I ended up having to delete the actual applications off of my phone temporarily due to lack of self control which proved to be quite humiliating.

Generally, this activity made me realize that I really need to take more time to disconnect from the social aspects that seem to dictate what makes me feel included. At the same time, not being able to look up the status of the current political issues that are changing daily as well as other international news was disheartening. I feel privileged to be able to connect with the world around me, as I know how many other people do not have that option. GOOD.

How I know what I know about myself

As an outlier in my generation of constantly connected individuals, eliminating the news from my everyday life did not bring much tribulation. I practice the impoliteness of disconnecting A PITHY PHRASE often since my discovery of transcendentalism and the wise words of Thoreau and Emerson back in high school. Thus, my experience with this assignment was quite nominal, but I did utilize the 48 hours to do some self-reflection on FULL NAME Deresiewicz’s article and how I felt being that small percentage of young people who do not fear solitude.

Reading the article in more depth, I felt offended at Deresiewicz’s commentary on my generation’s inability to embrace loneliness. He generalized an entire group of individuals as being incapable of profoundness when it comes to our identity and realization of society. I took the time that I had away from the news to analyze his critique and see if my own hyper-visuality impaired my understanding of the darkness and solitude within me.

I can only speak for myself and maybe a few like-minded individuals when I say that after the 48 hours I did not become more self aware or anxious because of my disconnection. The solitude that Deresiewicz’s argues about is something I have tried to embrace way before I even knew of its existence. That in part could be because I grew up being that anomaly among my peers. I always questioned everything and tried to like Deresiewicz’s said march to the beat of my own drum. As I learned more about social norms and Freud’s understanding of the human psyche further along in my education, that’s when I started to realize that my thoughts and understandings of the world weren’t the same as the people around me and that that was one of the reasons why solitude was more commonplace to me then others.

While my friends were obsessing over MySpace and Facebook, I was arguing its superficiality and disassociating myself from what now is such a dominant part of people’s lives. I would pride myself for not being a part of social media, but the loneliness was a difficult burden to carry. What I have learned is that it is acceptable to embrace our culture of celebrity and connectivity because it’s a part of our identity, but we do need some time to disconnect because that disconnection allows us to face our loneliness and discover other parts of our identity. A GOOD POINT. THIS SHOULD HAVE BEEN YOUR THESIS. I am not alone in thinking this either, and Deresiewicz’s underestimates my generation in saying that we are incapable of loneliness. We are capable, but we choose not too because it is an extraordinary ability to have all the information in the world so accessible. By being away from it for 48 hours, I realized that we do take it for granted and how it important it is to the building of our solidarity and introspection. Without the news or the Internet, I would not be able to write this. These mediums enlighten my thinking and connect me with other people who accept their loneliness and have similar thoughts to my own.

Rhetorical Analysis on Why Our Memory Fails us

Thesis: Through the incorporation of all three aspects of the rhetorical triangle, FIRST NAMES Chabris and Simons are able to bring together captivating arguments as to, Why Our Memory Fails Us. BE MORE SPECIFIC.

Like many great writers, Chabris and Simons use the trilateral relationship of the rhetorical triangle to build their case of “Why Our Memory Fails Us”. When reading through the article the appeal to logos and ethos is very transparent in the ways that the authors use the credibility of astrophysicist Neil Tyson, along with high-ranking political figures such as, former President George W. Bush and former Secretary of State Hillary Clinton. By using these political figures it allowed the readers to give credibility to what they were reading. Along with using political figures the authors also went on to use trusted psychologist who had done studies on the exact topic at hand, providing the readers now with facts and case studies, appealing them to logos.

NOTICE I STARTED A NEW PARAGRAPH Once the authors had built their case and presented us, the readers, with the effect of ethos and logos they played on the emotions of the audience by ending the article with pathos by stating that: “how we respond to these events can be telling”. They then go on to tell us that we must, “be more understanding” because “we are all fabulist, and we must all get use to it”. This appeals to our emotions because it allows us to identify with Neil Tyson, President Bush and Hillary Clinton, as a way of putting us in their shoes so we can better understand why they could possibly make these memory mistakes. The tone that the authors used seemed to be from a teaching standpoint. They wanted to prove that because a person’s memory may fail them, it does not automatically mean that they are lying.

When reading through the top three picks of the reader’s comments you can see how the three differentiate completely, which many people found convincing because in those three comments it showed three completely different spectrums of opinions that could relate to so many different people. The first reader pick was by Neil Tyson himself, who appeals to readers through ethos and logos by putting links to his personal social media accounts, where he further discussed the issues on his own behalf. This act of placing links to his personal email portrays to readers that there may be more facts to be heard. The second comment unlike the first is from a man named Keith, who appeals to readers through pathos and logos by stating his distrust for the credibility of the author due to his own opinion and dislike of President Bush appealing to pathos; but in his comment he goes on to add quotes from President Bush himself and links to form facts of his opinion that the former President is not a credible source, which appeals to the idea of logos. The third readers pick is by a man named Jacob who uses the appeal of pathos by giving examples of his own everyday life and what his reasoning behind his belief is.

Like the readers top three picks, the New York Times top three picks also differentiated completely from one another. Although the first two New York Times comments appeal to the readers through pathos, the two commenters have two completely different opinions on the subject at hand. Unlike the third commenter, which appeals to readers through ethos by using a college learning experience performed by a professor to validate her theory on the subject. Furthermore, I believe that the approach that the New York Times uses for their ranking of comments is effective, because it allows people to immediately read three totally different opinions without having to sift through thousands of comments to get an overall idea of what people thought about the article. By reading through the top three readers picks and the New York Times top three picks it seems as if the consensus amongst both rankings is that people are diverse in their thinking, and that is what people are most interested in reading: diverse opinions.