Secrets/Revelations

Although there are unlimited reasons people lie to others, the main reasons people lie are to protect themselves or the people they love.

Throughout one’s life, there are several different version of lies people tell in order to get throughout their day. Some might be bigger than others, however, there are usually several versions of the truth that society deviates to in order to get by.

Although there are unlimited reasons for people to lie, one of the biggest reason as to why I have lied in the past is to protect myself or someone I love. Recently, one of my friends confided in me through some issue she and her family where going through. We were on a phone call when she told me everything they were going through and I was in the car parked outside of my boyfriend’s house. As we hung up the phone, I dried up my tears to the best of my ability and tied to look as fresh as possible to refrain getting asked why I was crying. As I walked into his house, him along with his family immediately noticed I had been crying and asked why. So, I lied. To him and to his family in order to protect my friend.

I had told them that I was crying because I had gotten in an argument with my sister in order to deviate from what had actually happened. Although I lied to people I care about a lot because I knew it was not my information to share. I made a promise to my friend and although lying in not  a respectable quality, it changed nothing in their lives and protected someone I love. Thinking back at the incident I realized that I was lying in order to keep something confidential which was when I understood the relationship these two traits have. GOOD Through confidentially, whether it be with your lawyer or your doctor, people are agreeing to refrain from disclosing information with people they care about, regardless of who they are.

The way we intake information depends on the information we are receiving. If one is listening to a funny story about their day or perhaps gossip about another person, they might listen to the story in hopes of telling someone else. If one is listening to information they have to keep quiet about and be discreet, the way they think about it is drastically differently because they do not have to think about how it could affect them or others, they simply cannot share the information. GOOD USE OF CONCEPTS AND ANALYSIS

 

 

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I Have a Secret

THESIS: My mother had asked me to keep a secret from my grandmother and my oldest sister. The experience was not empowering to anyone, outsiders were trying to crack the secret, and it left a burden on me- feeling extremely anxious, stressed, and overwhelmed with the whole situation.

For the purpose of this assignment, I’m supposed to think about a situation in my life in which I felt compelled to lie to keep a secret or protect a person to whom you promised confidentiality. My situation is in a family environment. My mother had asked me to keep a secret from my grandmother and my oldest sister. The experience was not empowering to anyone, outsiders were trying to crack the secret, and it left a burden on me feeling extremely anxious, stressed, and overwhelmed with the whole situation.

My grandmother, Mima, was diagnosed with Stage 4 Pancreatic Cancer two years ago. After a year of extensive chemotherapy, thankfully she was fully recovered and cancer free. Three months after her success, she was re-examined after she had been off chemotherapy after surviving pancreatic cancer. The doctor revealed the saddening news that the cancer had came back, but this time not only in her pancreas, it had now spread to her liver.

Another year of vigorous chemotherapy, which did not get rid of any of the tumors, but rather just maintain them. Two years of chemotherapy and 3 surgeries to remove very serious tumors, Mima had another check-up where the doctor revealed to my mother that the cancer had metastasized to her lung. The doctor we see speaks English and Mima only speaks Spanish. My mother had specifically asked the doctor to not reveal the news to Mima because it was only going to discourage her from continuing the chemo and just give up.

My mother had an extremely difficult time keeping this to herself. My mother sees my father, my middle sister, and I as intimates, where she tells us everything and revealed the scary news. My oldest sister is in law school and is studying for the bar and cracks under pressure and stress, so my mother asked us not to tell her either.

My oldest sister noticed how on-edge every one was, especially after Mima’s appointment. She knew something was up. Especially with the holidays coming up, my oldest sister planned a trip with her boyfriend’s family to go out of time for thanksgiving. I found myself being extremely angry at her for skipping thanksgiving, the holiday we spend with Mima. She did not understand why I was so angry for her missing one holiday. Today, it is still causing problems around the house.

My family chose to keep this secret from my oldest sister until she takes the bar and from my grandmother so she does not lose any hope in continuing to fight. SORRY TO HEAR. GOOD USE OF CONCEPTS.

Disconnected from the world.


On Wednesday, 4th of October I stated the 48-hour disconnection from the news. This meant no Reddit, no CNN or any news channels, disabling all notifications from news app on my phone and computer and asking the groups where I usually chatted to avoid notifying me of news along ignoring a couple of my email accounts.

My first experience on the first day was a bit of anxiety, I use my free time to browse news on web-pages and read. Without this I had to have another activity to work my mind, mostly on games or taking care of the house. One small caveat of being disconnected from news of any type was going into a classroom where one of my classes was cancelled, and not finding out about my grades on a test if it weren’t by mere coincidence that another person from that class recognized me on a laboratory and told me that the grades were posted. Anxiety was present as I was following news stories before I started the activity

and wanted to fill in the gaps on any news I had read with any new information. Not only that but as I come from Venezuela, without news I was thinking what was happening regarding the latest events on the country.  INTERESTING

I could identify this experiences with the ones described by Deresiewicz as solitude, I was thinking about what were the news today, which means I was grieving the absence of information of the world, after all most of my free time is spend reading news articles about technology, politics and

economy. GOOD

After finishing the 48 hours on Friday morning, the first thing I did was read the news, and realized that

without just checking news of any type. I was disconnected from my social groups, as most of the subjects of talk were current events. The internet has become part of our life and we are fed information and news of any type each day, knowing this, being ignorant of any development on the world and the internet itself keeps you disconnected from other people on the internet or real life, as any event in the world that is being reported, becomes the subject of any casual conversation. Yet, News do create some solitude, it is not a complete intrusion nor it does not create solitude. News makes us think by ourselves and builds a small bubble of solitude. I can easily show an example on this case, People develop opinions on a news segment while others develop a contrasting opinion which in turn ends up isolating any of the two. For example: Those who think that privacy is a right and those who think that privacy is a luxury, one can simply say the argument that the government should not spy on us and someone else will say “but why, are you hiding something illegal?’ and this sparks some solitude in certain way, you isolate yourself from this person and then try to find another person that shares the same opinion, or is open to discussion of the subject, or even just stay alone with your opinion.

Watching the news is important, not only they give you the information you need to develop an opinion, they might affect you directly as any event currently happening might influence you. If a company you use gets hacked, or if the road you drive to has traffic, you may only know about this thanks to the news and be able to plan or respond accordingly. Solitude can be a great thing, but in this world and age, being isolated from information can be negative. GOOD ANALYSIS

48-Hour News Blackout

After reading the article “The End of Solitude,” I found myself agreeing or attesting to Deresiewicz’s case on how our digital information society is eliminating any hope or attempt of being alone. After reading the article, my task was to put myself in a Twilight Zone of partial solitude for 48 hours- meaning to disconnect myself from any form of digital interaction.

 

On a normal day, I am constantly on my phone, computer, or watching Netflix. It was extremely challenging to not use any of these devices, especially because everyone would non-stop talk about what was on in the news. I was going crazy at the thought that I had to isolate myself from everyone and even eat alone because that is all people were chatting about. My generation, as Deresiewicz mentions, was not raised to be comfortable or able to adapt to being bored.

 

The second I went to work, I explained the purpose of my assignment and for no one to discuss what was being said in the news. However, every single one of my co-workers had their eyes glued to the television and the only topic of conversation was what was being said on the news. I felt anxious and jittery and developed a fear of missing out. I also found myself constantly trying to find excuses to ease drop on their conversations about what was being presented in the news.

 

By the second day, I still had to isolate myself from the majority of conversations because again, the hot topic was whatever was revealed on the new about what happened the first 24 hours of my twilight zone.

 

Just as Deresiewicz mentions, I was terrified of being bored and did not find myself wanting to explore “the integrity of the self.” The more I experienced solitude, the more I found myself being anxious and scared. I completely agree that our use of technology seems to involve a continuous attempt to “stave off the possibility of solitutde.”

 

After 48 hours had passed, I was overwhelmed with the saddening events that was the hot topic while I was in my ‘twilight zone’. On the night of October 1, 2017, 58 people were killed and more than 500 injured in the Las Vegas shooting. Tom Petty had passed away at the age of 66 and Trump also visited Puerto Rico to provide relief from Hurricane Irma.   SAD. GREAT JOB ON THE ASSIGNMENT HOWEVER.

48 Hours of Solitude

In Deresiewicz article, “The End of Solitude,” he delves into how technology has changed the way we think as well as operate since we are never truly alone anymore. With the world at our fingertips at every moment of the day, the people of today day-today world, especially generation Z – who has never been in a world without technology – are never truly alone. In his article, Deresiewicz argues that being alone is an essential part of understanding who one is as well as the fact that the people of today’s society should strive to make their a little more lonely in order to make better connections personally.

In his article, Deresiewicz also argues that through this technological world, society has become more dependent on being know, seen, and acknowledged though images and social media. Through social media, not only is society never alone, but they are also changing in the way they live their life as a major component has become to share what they are doing. As a millennial, I can definitely see myself in this argument, because whether society likes to admit it or not, social media and technological connections have become the main component of my relationships.

Through my 48 hours of solitude, technology left my life and anxiety entered. Although I choose to occupy my 48 hours with activities so I would not want to use my phone as much as I would want to if I were home alone, the experience was a lot harder than I thought it would be. Durring my hours of solitude, I surrounded myself with friends and family, and although I was not alone, I felt so excluded from everything and everyone.

The physical aspect of not having a phone in my hand was probably one of the hardest things to get used to. Although it might sound weird, not having my phone in my hand or in my pocket or even on the table when I ate made me feel naked and strange. This was when I noticed that my phone has become a part of me, because a lot of the time, I do not unlock it to do something in specific, I just do it because it is a force of habit.

During these two days, I realized how dependent I was on technology. Whether it was to check the weather, or was going on in my Instagram feed, the lack of connection was surprising. I did realize, however, that although it was initially lonelier to not to have connection to the outside world, I was able to concentrate more on myself and my thought as well as what I was doing. Usually, if I am watching a movie, I am also on my phone and although I think I am paying attention, I am not.

My life is definitely too dependent to quit social media from one day to the next, however, I did understand Deresiewicz’s argument and was able to relate to it on a deeper level.

48-Hour News Blackout

Deresiewicz argues that we are a culture of celebrity and connectivity; living within this culture, it’s difficult to disagree. Experiencing solitude from news sources was intriguing, to say the least. Distancing myself from all news had an effect on me that I was expecting. It was when I began to fully submerge myself into this isolation that I realized I had failed to visit this moment of solitude in quite some time.

The reality of feeling a sense of responsibility for keeping up with the news in the nation or worldwide is real and it’s in our conscious every day. It’s almost as if there is a lack of social participation that is frowned upon when I was asked about a recent news event that I had no idea about. I noticed that it was almost impossible to remain astray from conversations that touched on the subject of news.

When I was alone, away from the company of others, I noticed that this task became easier. I began to question the feeling of urgency to constantly be aware of everything that is going on around the world, and why not knowing made me feel a bit guilty but liberated, nonetheless. Being disconnected felt peaceful, it felt as if I had no one to attend to and I enjoyed that.

The idea brought up by Deresiewicz, that we are a culture of miniature celebrities due to the constant reassurance we seem to seek through our followers’ “likes” and their engagement to the content we post, is the reality that me and my generation are currently facing. Staying off these social media applications made me feel anxious, I realized that I became dependent on having a constant distraction from my responsibilities, understanding why I had this feeling was complicated.

We like to think that we are independent beings; the notion of living in a world where we are all fending for ourselves, a world that pushes individuality and sets a tone of “every man for himself”. This is all far from our reality because even though it seems as we are all interconnected, we truly are extremely disconnected outside of the online world.

Sharing our concentration between our daily tasks and everyday news obtrudes our attentiveness and shifts our focus. It instills a worried feeling, it is as powerful as to change your mood and the energy in which you go about throughout your day. I’d like to know the reason behind broadcasting, what seems like, every single thing that goes wrong in the world, and making this information available to everyone at any and every time of the day.

Reconsidering the true purpose of news, I found myself questioning the intention behind the news that are shared with the public. It’s almost as if the purpose is to instill fear of the reality we live in, when humans fear, they are more vulnerable and susceptible of believing anything that is presented to them. I have to agree and accept that there is a social responsibility of knowing what’s going on around the world, this way we maintain a certain connection with others across the globe, the news allows us to be aware and base our decisions off of the information given. However, without deep analyzation ANALYSIS and questioning what is presented to us, lies an opportunity for manipulation and control of society.

48 Hours Without News

Before this assignment started, my stance on Deresiewicz’s article “The End of Solitude” was in agreement with the author. This young adult generation is severely obsessed with the idea of celebrity. Being noticed– for better or worse– is something most of us now yearn. Connectivity is also something this generation cannot live without. We have been raised in the idea that interconnecting and shrinking the world is a good thing that we have not noticed the regression in the way we interact with other people, become intimate with other people, and how we interact with ourselves. Saying celebrity and connectivity has made us fear solitude might be an understatement; for most of us nowadays it is almost taboo.

 

I started my 48-hour news blackout on Saturday and ended it today around noon time. The first thing I did was deactivate all notifications on my phone’s news apps- CNN, ESPN, and news podcasts that I listen to such as FiveThirtyEight and NPR. Instagram and Facebook were deleted off my phone an hour later while twitter was easier to get rid of considering I don’t really use the app. Saturday was by far the easiest day for this assignment. Without being preoccupied with news, I found myself downloading games like minesweeper to pass time. When a group of friends asked me to accompany them to watch UM play FSU, I refused, knowing I would inevitably hear sources of news with them. HAHA WOW! COMMITMENT.  Although I wasn’t completely cut off from the internet, I used entertainment as a substitute for my news apps. I read a book and watched movies, which are some things I have usually enjoyed but have done less and less over the past couple of years if it’s without company. To a certain extent, I had liked the solitude I began to engage in. It was a breath of fresh air compared to reading articles and headlines.

 

Being an avid participant of Fantasy Football, I gave my log in and control of my teams to my brother. Not being able to check on NFL scores was by far the hardest part of this assignment. Sunday, as a result, was the hardest day to go through. I spent the day with friends but often found myself out of the loop and more quiet in the conversations we were having. They talked about topics in sports, entertainment, and politics while I would ignore what they said and instead spent time on my phone, biding my time by playing games, changing some settings on my phone, and downloading lifestyle apps. While it is good to engage in solitude– I, for the record, still agree with Deresiewicz and his views in the article– I soon came to realize how connection is vital nonetheless to what people would call “keeping up with the times.” Needless to say, I spent a good amount of time today after the completion of the 48 hours using all the apps that I deactivated/deleted for this assignment.