Topsy Kretts



One of my best friends Dustin and I were out having more drinks than anyone should, when Dustin accidentally told me a secret.

“I have to tell you something,” he said. “I’ve been sleeping with Ashley.”

Ashley was the girlfriend of the best man at my wedding, Zack.

“Please don’t tell Zack,” he pleaded. “Now’s not the time.”

I hesitated to agree to his begs for confidentiality because I had no desire to learn this information; I was able to objectively consider the situation. If I agreed to keep this secret, I would be justifying the lies and deceit, committed to my prima facia duties. Out of loyalty to one of my best friends I decided to agree to keep his secret.

I contemplated the outcomes of their situation and how my unintentional becoming of an insider would effect the situation. I had no desire to learn that information and since my learning of the information was unintentional I did not feel I had to uphold my prima facia duties, until I agreed to confidentiality.

“What would I want to know if I were Zack?” I asked myself. “Would I want to be told by a friend, or my girlfriend?”

I reasoned with Dustin to come out and tell the truth, arguing he could not have a relationship with someone who is already in one.

“It doesn’t work that way,” I said. “If she loves you, why is she with someone else?”

“It’s complicated,” he replied.

What was complicated was keeping an innocent best friend of mine from knowing the truth about his cheating girlfriend. I wanted to tell Zack, but did not think I should be the one to tell him.

I threatened Dustin with outing this secret if he did not. I was committed to keeping my loyalty to Dustin; I also had the need to tell Zack out of loyalty to our long friendship.

“I’m going to tell Zack tomorrow,” I said. “You have until then to come clean or convince her to.”

“I understand,” he said.

“I would do the same for you buddy,” I said.

Dustin understood my emotions and the predicament in which he put me.
My prima facia duties to keep the secret I vowed to keep was not broken, because Dustin made Ashley come clean the next morning.

Dustin and Ashley dated for years afterward; It ended with Ashley secretly sleeping with his other best friend, Alan, for almost the entirety of their relationship.



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