Secrets

I had to keep a secret which I strongly disagreed with once. It went against my moral fiber, and every bit of me cringed every time I thought about it. I have a friend who I love like family, and she was dating someone who was in a different part of life than she was. He was older than her, by five years. It may not be that much, but it seemed like decade when she was 17 and the guy was 22. The age itself may not have been that much of an issue, if her parents didn’t have a huge issue with the whole thing. I understand Thomas Drake’s perspective; much like he was against what was going on behind closed doors, I was against my friend’s secrecy. The difference is that Thomas Drake was an insider, protecting national security and waste; I believed that I was an outsider with limited authority to a problem which is minimal in comparison to Drake’s dilemma.

 

The issue at hand provided me a moral issues of secrecy and confidentiality. The issue was “she is doing something that isn’t acceptable, but does that give me the authority to tell her parents, or is it not my business?” I believed that her safety was at stake, but is that a big enough reason to break whatever level of confidence she placed in me? Was confidentiality more important than her wellbeing? I didn’t want one of my closest friends to be mad at me for telling on her, but

I and her family saw him as dangerous to her mental health; should have I what I knew anyway? CAREFUL. DON’T OVERDO THE RHETORICAL QUESTIONS.

There are things that were told to me (not by her) that I was totally unsure about. Was This information accurate? I don’t even know the people who stated it. Information passed along is like a game of telephone, and we all know this by now. How could I really trust what someone inferred from their perception? Information might be initially be objective, but humans are emotional beings and tend to make it subjective when we infer something from our own perception. Information is all in ones perception, and a faulty one can lead to impermissible deception (no pun intended).

The linkage between secrecy, lying, and confidentiality was blatant at that time. My friend wanted to keep confidentiality about her situation because it was not acceptable by her family. She gave information to people around her, or held out on information, based on her relationship to people. Her friends lied for her to keep those secret(s) from her family (which included me). I felt no empowerment; in fact, I felt emotionally drained to hold onto a secret which I hated. I understand Drake’s perspective on releasing the information. Is it more important to protect the greater good (of a group or an individual), or yourself from the backlash of release confidential information? My friend felt empowered, as she was getting by with the secret — for a while anyway. As with all great secrets, hers was found out and I was relieved of my dilemma SPELLING.

 

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